Long overdue

It has been a pretty busy past 9 weeks! My daughter is here! She came on May 28th, at 5:23am. She is 2 months old today, and I feel like she was just born yesterday. I haven't had a minute to blog though. She is beautiful, and so amazing, but very hard right now. She has severe acid reflux, and colic. Each week brings a bit of improvement. We are waiting for that "miraculous" 3 month mark that everyone says it goes away. She refuses a pacifier, and YES, we have tried many kinds, yet she will suck on her blankets, my shoulder, my arm, anything that is near her mouth that ISN'T meant to be sucked on. She also fights the bottle like it's trying to harm her. If I am anywhere in the room, or if she's even seen me in the previous minutes, you can forget it. She won't do it. She is one stubborn little miss.

I believe part of the crying is definitely a hot temper that my part Italian part German daughter has unfortunately inherited. We will be laying hands and praying over her very soon! I keep telling her, if this continues in a year, she will be receiving many spankings. Don't say I didn't warn you!

We have a pretty wonderful routine down. She's been a great sleeper since she was 2 weeks old, that's never been a problem. Awake time was always the problem. She only gets up once in the night, between 2:30 and 4, depending on when she finally falls asleep at night, and then is up between 5:30 and 7am for a bit. She wakes up so happy, smiling, talking, playing. I love those times. It lasts about a 1/2 hour and then she's so hungry. She eats, plays some more and eats again around 9, this time, she is swaddled though. I have learned very quickly, if my child isn't swaddled, she will NOT sleep more than 15 minutes. I swear, she's going to be a year and still swaddling! Let's not go there just yet! After this feeding, she will sleep for 3 hours!!! It's an incredible nap, and it's like clockwork. I only wish I was home for it to sleep right along with her. She wakes up happy and ready to play for about 1/2 an hour again before she is hungry. She eats, and after being up for about an hour and a half, is down again for another 2 - 3 hour nap. You could almost set your watches to her naps. It is wonderful. After that though, you can forget it. No more naps for the day. She wakes up a beast from that nap, eats, cries, eats, cries, maybe plays for a little while with mommy and daddy, and then cries some more. At 8:30/9pm we go up for a bath. She LOVES her baths, smiling, giggling, playing. So content. I'm thinking of putting her in the bathtub around 4pm and not taking her out til she's going to bed at night. Honestly, I am. In her bath is where I can get her to take her medicines without crying, I also get her to eat 2 tablespoons of cereal with 2 ounces of milk. She's been doing this since 4 weeks. I hate that she's on cereal already, but it helps with keeping the food in her stomach that the acid is always wanting to push back up. I nurse her one last time around 9:30 and she's out again for the night til 2:30/3:30ish. I love that she loves her schedule, and I love that she is so easy to be on a schedule already. I know some people take a long time to find a schedule for their baby. Claire just kinda made her own, and I stick with it. Only downfall to the scheduled life is it makes my days go by super fast, and that only means my baby girl gets one day older a lot faster than I would like.

She is the most amazing gift Anthony and I have ever received though, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I even think that a sister or brother is possible now. If you had asked me right after giving birth, and again when we first got home and didn't know what was wrong with Claire, I would have told you otherwise. She was close to being an only child!

Birth story to come next time I have a few minutes (who knows when that will be!). I will leave you with this picture of my beautiful, amazing little miracle...

A few minutes old:

2 Months Old:

I'm late...

...well, Claire is late. Her due date has come and gone with no signs that she is in a hurry to arrive. We were told to prepare for an early baby because we were fertility. Here Claire is, already defying the norm. Hope she's like that in her walk with Jesus as well! We have been praying over her since day one that she would be a life changer, passionate for her Savior, and so in love with Who He is. She is our miracle, and we gave her back to God at week 6 of her life inside of me when we got the little scare that she wasn't going to be ok. I can't wait to see her personality, her character, her love for others, but most of all I can't wait to see her FACE!!! She has hid her face from us this entire time, revealing an ear here, a nose there, a corner of an eye here. I have NO idea what she will look like, and just am so anxious to finally meet her.

Our last dr appointment went well. She is "docile" according to my dr. I'm holding her to that! She moves about twice a day, just wiggles a little, then she pretty much sleeps the rest of the time. She is really, really, really, REALLY low. I know this because I pulled my groin muscle about 3 weeks ago, just before she dropped, and can literally feel her pushing on that muscle at certain points of the day. Makes for one funny looking walk.

Dr. said I'm 3cm dilated, and 75% effaced. She stripped my membranes yesterday at our appointment, and is believing from the looks of things that I will go on my own. If not though, we have a decision to make. My dr. is on call this Friday, as well as next Friday the 4th. She really doesn't want me going to Friday June 4th because it's past the "safe" 41 1/2 weeks that she says one should go. This Friday would be just shy of 41 weeks and would be the best option if our dr is going to induce. This means I would go in Thursday night. 2 DAYS AWAY!!! We are praying and believing that I go on my own. If not, we have to decide whether we risk waiting to go on my own the following week, or be induced by a dr who knows nothing about my body and where we've been on this journey to have our child. NOT easy for me to trust another dr to know and understand who Anthony and I are, and how we would like to bring this child into the world.

I know there is no planning for birth. It comes when your body is ready, and if not, they have to force it. We just really looked forward to all the options we had to labor at home, to use the jet tubs, to use the ball, to walk around, to NOT be confined to a bed. I don't want to labor the entire time in a bed. What they are thinking right now for induction would be to just break my water since I am pretty thinned and already at 3cm. If that doesn't progress though, it's the IV, and the yucky Pitocin, and the possibility of c-section. I rebuke all those things in Jesus name. Ultimately, it's up to God what experience I have in birthing this child. I just pray He chooses what Anthony and I would like :o)

That's all for now. Hopefully, my next update will be that I have been in labor and our daughter has safely arrived! I'm pretty anxious now that it's just around the corner. Any moment!!!

WoW...Let's pretend it hasn't been so long since we've chatted!

Don't mind the grammatical error or one giant paragraph, but I am just going to type everything I can think of for the past few months as I go, and not worry about how to format it...

Can't believe the last time I blogged was around Christmas. It's been so incredibly busy around here. Our baby room is almost complete. We have drawers and closets full of clothes. I'm getting bigger and bigger every day, and it's all happening so fast. I can't believe I am already at 32 weeks. I can't believe in 8 or less weeks we will have a daughter to hold, kiss, rock, nurture. I am so incredibly excited, and so incredibly nervous all at once. I've been in love since the day we found out, but scared about what this process entails just as much. We keep praying for little head, little shoulders, then we PROMISE to bulk her right up. We've gotten 2 more ultrasounds since the finding out of the sex. The first was to get a better look at her heart because they didn't get good measurements the first time. That was back in January. Then we went along, measuring right on, heartbeat perfect every time, movement was non-stop. The sickness went away, the headaches and dizziness went away, the exhaustion was less, and I slept great. THEN we hit 3rd trimester. I started getting nauseas again, I woke up about 5 times each night incredibly uncomfortable, the heartburn kicked in every time I ate or drank anything. Yesterday I went to the dr and Claire was measuring a little too small so I had to go for another ultrasound this morning. Everything looks good, she just apparently likes her feet up by her face. She is head down, but her feet are down there with her. She's quite the gymnist it seems. Her hands are still covering her face. She is a shy one. She doesn't want us to see her in entirety until the day she arrives. Then you better believe I will be staring at her face incessently. I can't wait to see every inch of her, and smell her, and kiss her. She is one miracle, that is for sure. Anthony was just saying this morning we have stories to tell her already, and she better not want allowance because of all the dr appointments we've needed to go to because she likes to "scare" the dr's. Just wait until she comes out and wraps his heart around her finger. She will just blink and get whatever it is in this world he can give her. Now we just wait. 8 more weeks. I pray it's in about 6. I just can't wait any longer. I want her in my arms. My arms have been waiting too long. The best friends in the world are throwing her a baby shower tomorrow. I will hopefully blog about it before July :o) Here are some pictures from the past few months:

This is her profile from today. She has her daddy's nose, and is sucking on her bottom lip.

This is the picture from January's ultrasound. She is holding on to her cord with both hands. It was a relief to see that today she has let the cord go!

Sorry, I thought I had pics of the nursery on this computer, but I don't. You can see those on my facebook account. She's one chubby cheeked little girl so far! Oh, and she has hair! Yea!!!

It's a....

GIRL!!! We went to the dr. on Wednesday the 23rd and had our ultrasound. We walked into our room and Anthony told the technician that we didn't want her to tell us the sex of the baby. We would like for her to seal it in an envelope so we could place it in our stocking and open with our presents (which would be Christmas Eve morning). She was excited for us. Apparently, we were the first ones to suggest that that day.

The technician went over every part of our baby, from the top of her head, to the tip of her toes. She then went to take some 3D pics, but admitted they wouldn't really turn out because she was hiding her face between her arms. Either she is defiant already, or she is really shy like her mommy. After the exam was over, while we waited for the pics to download to our CD, our technician left to write down the sex of the baby and seal it in an envelope. She returned and said she checked really hard to make sure we couldn't peak, holding it up to the lights and everything. What a fun lady she was!

On our way home I just agonized over the envelope. What was I thinking!? I just wanted to know. Anthony was strong though. He took the envelope away and took me back to work. It was a long afternoon at work wondering what my child was. It's all I could think about. When I got home, I begged my husband to open the envelope. He was pretty firm and strong about holding out til morning. Around 10pm that night though, he couldn't take it any longer either. He said we could open it at midnight, and technically it would be Christmas eve. It was such a long wait!!! We both stated what we thought the baby was. I was confident it was a boy. Anthony was pretty sure it was a girl. He said God has a lot to still teach him about sensitivity and such and so God would do it through his daughter. I handed him the envelope and had him open it. We both hung onto the paper like it was our child, slowly opened the note, and read it...."Congratulations, you are going to have a GIRL!" I couldn't believe it! We both teared up a little, and I was speechless. I was going to have a daughter in a few short months! My husband was going to have a daddy's little girl! I am still in awe!

We talked about names from the day we knew we would be a family before we were even married. We decided on the name Claire Marie. She is already such an important person in our lives! We quickly decided how we would share this with our families, and went to bed. It was 2:30 in the morning. I was exhausted!

I woke up at 6:30 sick to my stomach, so I had to get up to eat. I went back to bed, only to have my husband wake me up at 8 like a little child ready to open presents! I got about 4 hours of sleep and Claire and I were feeling it! Christmas was amazing knowing we were going to have a daughter. The feeling of being a mommy is indescribable to me. I have no words, only tears, and feelings of overwhelming joy.

Today, we went out shopping for a little while. All I wanted to do was find an outfit for Claire. I have waited for this day for so long. I couldn't wait to find out if the baby was a boy or girl so I could buy an outfit that wasn't gender neutral. We found the cutest dress ever and brought it home and hung it on our tree. I love her more than words can say already, and she already has daddy wrapped around her little finger.

Here is a picture of her hiding behind her arm.



Here is a picture of me at 18 weeks, just before we found out that we were having a girl. It's one of only 2 I have so far. I wasn't really in the picture taking mood up until recently. I've just been so sick.

So sue me...

It's been a long time since I last posted. I know. I can't help it. In the last post I noticed I wrote about how I thought things were turning around with being sick. Boy was I wrong. We are at just over 17 weeks right now, and I'm still sick. The last week has been the best I've had yet though. So do I dare say now that I think things may be turning around? In the past few months there's been a hospital visit, Dr visits, weight loss, lots of laying on my couch feeling useless as my husband does EVERYTHING around the house....it's been slightly miserable. I say slightly because my baby is doing wonderful through all this, and is healthy, and very active. I just have a few side effects. I'll take it though. Every last one. I won't lie, it gets hard sometimes. I feel like I can't do it much longer, and then I have a non-sick day, and I'm so happy to have this baby. I feel so blessed that after all we went through, in the grand scheme of things, some couples go through way more, with less than exciting results. For that, I thank God every morning that He chose us to be able to carry this baby and parent this child. What an amazing gift.

We have our ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby on Wednesday the 23rd. We will have them seal it in an envelope though and place it in our stocking to open on Christmas morning. The best Christmas present has been this child, so what better than to find out if our child will be a boy or girl on Christmas! We are so excited. My husband gives me the countdown every evening. He is so adorable. I tease (though I think it is going to come true more and more each day) him that after this child is born, I will never be able to hold and snuggle him or her because my husband won't share. He will be the best daddy ever. I can't wait to see him with our baby. It gives me goosebumps just thinking about it!

We are almost half way through this pregnancy. So far, I've had a slight weight loss, nothing terrible. The Dr said she isn't going to worry until we are at 20 weeks. If we don't start gaining then, she will begin to do some tests to figure out why. She did say that some people just don't gain any weight while pregnant and their babies are perfectly fine. I volunteer to be that person! Heck yes! As long as my child is healthy and receiving everything he/she needs, bring on the "no weight gain"!

We have taken one picture on my belly since this all began. My husband bugged me for weeks to take pictures, but I told him, if you had the flu and I kept bugging you to pose and smile for me so I could take a picture, I think you would punch me. Well, no one wants to take a picture when they feel like they are close to death's door. I told him now that I'm feeling better, we can take a picture every week if he wants, and believe me, he wants! I will post the pic soon. It's of 16 weeks. I seemed to have popped this past week as the sweater I wore to church last Sunday is now become a belly shirt for me.

I will try to keep this updated more. I really will, but if it's anything like the first 17 weeks, I may not be on for a while. So sue me!

I like to move it, move it

We got to see the baby move today!!! It was so amazing. When we started the ultrasound, the baby was sleeping, and just lying there still. But after a lot of probing, and probably annoying my child, he/she started moving and swimming all around. We got to see the arms moving and the legs kicking. The baby was trying to suck it's thumb at one point. It was incredible. I never thought I could feel more joy each and every time we see the baby.

This was our last appointment with the fertility clinic. We are officially graduates of that place. We couldn't be happier. The doctor said she would save a spot on the board for a pic of the baby. I hope we never have to go back there again. They were incredible though. There wouldn't be another place I would recommend higher than the Unity Hospital Fertility Clinic. Such great staff, and they just were compassionate from day one.

I am still sick, though I think things are starting to turn for the better since every few days I can eat a little bit or normal food. It's nice to sit down and have a small meal instead of just a few crackers and an Ensure. Really nice.

Here is the last pic of the baby. It's a little blurry because my bladder filled back up and she couldn't get as close to the baby as she had in the past. You can really see his/her arms and legs in this pic. This is the pic they got while the baby was still sleeping sweetly.

I just want to eat!!!!

This week has started even more nausea and vomiting. SO fun. No, but really, I am grateful that the baby is healthy. I just really want to eat. I pretty much am on an Ensure diet, with a few crackers (gluten free of course), and rice cakes in there intermittently. Last Sunday, I really really craved chicken wings. So after calling about a dozen places to find one that made them with a sauce that was gluten free, I ordered them. My wonderful husband picked them up for me and off I went. It was the first real food I had eaten in 3 weeks. I know, hindsight is always 20/20. If my stomach hasn't really had food in 3 weeks, prolly shouldn't be introducing chicken wings as the first food! Don't worry, I learned the hard way. I was up all night Sunday, getting sick, and getting sick again. Good times. Cravings aren't always good you know? What? You did know? Thanks for sharing! The next few days were a toilet hugging blur.

A friend of mine told me about SeaBands. I literally am willing to try anything. So I've been wearing them for the remainder of the week. I do have to say they help with the nausea, but I still can't eat. So I'm hungry, which in turn leaves me with some nausea. It's a no win situation at this point. Another friend mentioned to me that she chewed Bubble Gum constantly. Again, I will try anything. I bought some and along with the bands it's going pretty good. It's a jaw tiring feat though. Each day is different. I don't know if I believe it's either theory. But for now, I am not about to stop either because I don't like feeling like I'm about to lose it any second all day long.


On the dr front, we have our last appointment with our fertility specialist on Monday. That means no more weekly pictures. I will be sad, but also so incredibly happy to carry on like a normal pregnancy for the remainder of this child's stay at Casa de Womb. We have our first appointment with our OB on Friday. It's so exciting.

Our next ultrasound will probably be around Christmas to find out the sex of the baby. Can't wait. That is our only element of surprise in this pregnancy because everyone really knew about the fertility and dates of possibly pregnancy. No surprise or creative stories there. It will be fun to surprise everyone in our family and our friends at Christmas with what we will be having. I've felt like it's a girl for the past 10 weeks, BUT last night I had my first good dream about the baby. In the dream I was decorating the nursery, and putting the clothes away, and they were all boy clothes. Now, I don't know what I feel. My husband wants a boy, and so do I. I think it would be nice for my children to have a big brother. We'll see. Either way, I am will be so happy for a healthy baby.





Here's our last picture of the little one. The baby is growing so much each week. It's so incredibly amazing!